By Elder Dallin H. Oaks Of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
Read : As followers of Christ we should live peacefully with others who do not share our values or accept the teachings upon which they are based.
READ
When J. Golden was president of the LDS Church's Southern States mission, the Mormon missionaries were being assailed by the Ku Klux Klan. J. Golden recorded in his diary that he went to Athens, Ga., to comfort 28 missionaries. After a religious meeting in a forested, outdoor setting, they were interrupted by members of the KKK, who settled in across the river. By the light of the moon, J. Golden could see white sheets, a fire, and he could smell the pungent aroma of tar. J. Golden knew what it was like to be tarred and feathered, so he told the missionaries, "I'll talk to these men. I can talk their language."
When they yelled across the stream that they had come "to teach the Mormons a lesson," J. Golden said, "Well, we're all Mormons - everyone of us - but Mormons have horns. You cross that stream, and we'll gore the hell right out of you."
They got on their horses and left. J. Golden later heard that one Klan leader had told another that "by the light of a full moon Mormons grow horns and become vicious."Q: What was J. Golden Kimball trying to do in his own way?
I. Learner Readiness
SAY: To start off the lesson, let's read verses of scripture that E. Oaks uses to start his talk.
READ the following:
READ A
READING A
John 13:34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.
John 15:12 This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.
John 15:17 These things I command you, that ye love one another.
Matthew 22:39 And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.
Mathew 5:44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;
SAY: After quoting all these scriptures, E. Oakes says
But the commandment to love others as He had loved His flock was to His disciples—and is to us—a challenge that was unique. “Actually,” President Thomas S. Monson taught us last April, “love is the very essence of the gospel, and Jesus Christ is our Exemplar. His life was a legacy of love.”
E. Oakes asks this question: Q:Why is it so difficult to have Christlike love for one another?
SAY He answers his question with this
SAY He answers his question with this
READ B
B - It is difficult because we must live among those who do not share our beliefs and values and covenant obligations...
We are to live in the world but not be of the world. We must live in the world because, as Jesus taught in a parable, His kingdom is “like leaven,” whose function is to raise the whole mass by its influence. His followers cannot do that if they associate only with those who share their beliefs and practices.
Q: What qualities of Christian discipleship are like leaven that will raise the whole mass? (long suffering, not easily provoked, love unfeigned, etc.)
Q: Why do these qualities leaven the whole mass? (because some will see their value and want them too)
B - It is difficult because we must live among those who do not share our beliefs and values and covenant obligations...
We are to live in the world but not be of the world. We must live in the world because, as Jesus taught in a parable, His kingdom is “like leaven,” whose function is to raise the whole mass by its influence. His followers cannot do that if they associate only with those who share their beliefs and practices.
Q: What qualities of Christian discipleship are like leaven that will raise the whole mass? (long suffering, not easily provoked, love unfeigned, etc.)
Q: Why do these qualities leaven the whole mass? (because some will see their value and want them too)
II. LEARNER INVOLVEMENT - Criticism
READ C
C - The gospel has many teachings about keeping the commandments while living among people with different beliefs and practices. The teachings about contention are central. When the resurrected Christ found the Nephites disputing over the manner of baptism, He gave clear directions on how this ordinance should be performed. Then He taught this great principle:
D - The Savior did not limit His warning against contention to those who were not keeping the commandment about baptism. He forbade contention by anyone. Even those who keep the commandments must not stir up the hearts of men to contend with anger. The “father of contention” is the devil; the Savior is the Prince of Peace.
Q: When is it okay to contend or be contentious?
Q: Is it ok to fight with our wives? With our children? Doing missionary work? In politics?
READ E
III. LEARNER APPLICATION
Q: What are some attributes of contention?
Q: What are the opposite attributes?
Q: What are some of the stimuli that can bring about a desire to be angry, contentious and the like? [misunderstood, mocking us, anger, being forced]
READ (excerpts from Alma 1) - the members of the Church began to persecuted. Let's see how the members responded.
READ F
READ G (22-24)
Q: Why were there hearts hardened?
READ H
READ I
READ Alma 4:14
Q: What are we invoking inside ourselves when we fight back (the natural man)
SAY: When we feel attacked, the natural man within us feels diminished. To restore itself to its original state it has to defend itself, it has to attack back, it has to become contentious.
Q: What can we do when that feeling come over us to fight back?
READ 3 Nephi 12:39
Q: When we feel persecuted or wronged, how ought we respond?
Q: What kind of inward development does it take not to fight back?
Q: What are the blessings of walking peaceably among the children of men? (
we no longer are in Satan's power;
the way is easy;
we become saviors on Mount Zion;
we receive the gift of charity;
we have true power (Q: Why?)
Q: Why is this true leaven?
Q: How do we get to this place where the natural man is virtually non-existent inside our beings?
Conclusion:
In so many relationships and circumstances in life, we must live with differences. Where vital, our side of these differences should not be denied or abandoned, but as followers of Christ we should live peacefully with others who do not share our values or accept the teachings upon which they are based. The Father’s plan of salvation, which we know by prophetic revelation, places us in a mortal circumstance where we are to keep His commandments. That includes loving our neighbors of different cultures and beliefs as He has loved us. As a Book of Mormon prophet taught, we must press forward, having “a love of God and of all men” (2 Nephi 31:20).
As difficult as it is to live in the turmoil surrounding us, our Savior’s command to love one another as He loves us is probably our greatest challenge. I pray that we may understand this and seek to live it in all of our relationships and activities, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Additional Story
READ Story
I close with another example of a family relationship. At a stake conference in the Midwest about 10 years ago, I met a sister who told me that her nonmember husband had been accompanying her to church for 12 years but had never joined the Church. What should she do? she asked. I counseled her to keep doing all the right things and to be patient and kind with her husband.
About a month later she wrote me as follows: “Well, I thought that the 12 years was a good show of patience, but I didn’t know if I was being very kind about it. So, I practiced real hard for over a month, and he got baptized.”
Kindness is powerful, especially in a family setting. Her letter continued, “I am even trying to be kinder now because we are working on a temple sealing this year!”
Six years later she wrote me another letter: “My husband was [just] called and set apart as the bishop [of our ward].”2
READ C
C - The gospel has many teachings about keeping the commandments while living among people with different beliefs and practices. The teachings about contention are central. When the resurrected Christ found the Nephites disputing over the manner of baptism, He gave clear directions on how this ordinance should be performed. Then He taught this great principle:
“There shall be no disputations among you, as there have hitherto been; neither shall there be disputations among you concerning the points of my doctrine, as there have hitherto been.
“For verily, verily I say unto you, he that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, who is the father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another.READ D
“Behold, this is … my doctrine, that such things should be done away” (3 Nephi 11:28–30; emphasis added).
D - The Savior did not limit His warning against contention to those who were not keeping the commandment about baptism. He forbade contention by anyone. Even those who keep the commandments must not stir up the hearts of men to contend with anger. The “father of contention” is the devil; the Savior is the Prince of Peace.
Q: When is it okay to contend or be contentious?
Q: Is it ok to fight with our wives? With our children? Doing missionary work? In politics?
READ E
E - D&C 19:29-30 And thou shalt declare glad tidings, yea, publish it upon the mountains, and upon every high place, and among every people that thou shalt be permitted to see.Q: What does it mean to not revile against revilers?
30 And thou shalt do it with all humility, trusting in me, reviling not against revilers.
III. LEARNER APPLICATION
Q: What are some attributes of contention?
Q: What are the opposite attributes?
Q: What are some of the stimuli that can bring about a desire to be angry, contentious and the like? [misunderstood, mocking us, anger, being forced]
READ (excerpts from Alma 1) - the members of the Church began to persecuted. Let's see how the members responded.
READ F
F - Alma 1:19 But it came to pass that whosoever did not belong to the church of God began to persecute those that did belong to the church of God, and had taken upon them the name of Christ.Q: What was the response of the members toward being afflicted with all manner of words?
20 Yea, they did persecute them, and afflict them with all manner of words, and this because of their humility; because they were not proud in their own eyes, and because they did impart the word of God, one with another, without money and without price.
READ G (22-24)
G - (Alma 1:22-24) Nevertheless, there were many among them who began to be proud, and began to contend warmly with their adversaries, even unto blows; yea, they would smite one another with their fists. Now this was in the second year of the reign of Alma, and it was a cause of much affliction to the church; yea, it was the cause of much trial with the church. For the hearts of many were hardened, and their names were blotted out, that they were remembered no more among the people of God. And also many withdrew themselves from among them.Q: Why did many withdraw from the Church (hearts hardened)
Q: Why were there hearts hardened?
READ H
H - Alma 1:25 Now this was a great trial to those that did stand fast in the faith; nevertheless, they were steadfast and immovable in keeping the commandments of God, and they bore with patience the persecution which was heaped upon themQ: Why would other members bare with patience the persecution heaped upon them? (for Christ's sake)
READ I
I - Alma 4:12-13 Yea, he saw great inequality among the people, some lifting themselves up with their pride, despising others, turning their backs upon the needy and the naked and those who were hungry, and those who were athirst, and those who were sick and afflicted. Now this was a great cause for lamentations among the people, while others were abasing themselves, succoring those who stood in need of their succor, such as imparting their substance to the poor and the needy, feeding the hungry, and suffering all manner of afflictions, for Christ’s sake, who should come according to the spirit of prophecy;Q: Why is it for Christ's sake that we do these things including suffering injustices from the hands of others? What is the connection?
READ Alma 4:14
14 Looking forward to that day, thus retaining a remission of their sins; being filled with great joy because of the resurrection of the dead, according to the will and power and deliverance of Jesus Christ from the bands of death.Q: Why doesn't Christ want us to fight back?
Q: What are we invoking inside ourselves when we fight back (the natural man)
SAY: When we feel attacked, the natural man within us feels diminished. To restore itself to its original state it has to defend itself, it has to attack back, it has to become contentious.
Q: What can we do when that feeling come over us to fight back?
READ 3 Nephi 12:39
39 But I say unto you, that ye shall not resist evil, but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also;
Q: What does Christ say to do when that natural man feeling to fight back starts come over you?
Q: What kind of inward development does it take not to fight back?
Q: What are the blessings of walking peaceably among the children of men? (
we no longer are in Satan's power;
the way is easy;
we become saviors on Mount Zion;
we receive the gift of charity;
we have true power (Q: Why?)
Q: Why is this true leaven?
Q: How do we get to this place where the natural man is virtually non-existent inside our beings?
Conclusion:
In so many relationships and circumstances in life, we must live with differences. Where vital, our side of these differences should not be denied or abandoned, but as followers of Christ we should live peacefully with others who do not share our values or accept the teachings upon which they are based. The Father’s plan of salvation, which we know by prophetic revelation, places us in a mortal circumstance where we are to keep His commandments. That includes loving our neighbors of different cultures and beliefs as He has loved us. As a Book of Mormon prophet taught, we must press forward, having “a love of God and of all men” (2 Nephi 31:20).
As difficult as it is to live in the turmoil surrounding us, our Savior’s command to love one another as He loves us is probably our greatest challenge. I pray that we may understand this and seek to live it in all of our relationships and activities, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Additional Story
READ Story
I close with another example of a family relationship. At a stake conference in the Midwest about 10 years ago, I met a sister who told me that her nonmember husband had been accompanying her to church for 12 years but had never joined the Church. What should she do? she asked. I counseled her to keep doing all the right things and to be patient and kind with her husband.
About a month later she wrote me as follows: “Well, I thought that the 12 years was a good show of patience, but I didn’t know if I was being very kind about it. So, I practiced real hard for over a month, and he got baptized.”
Kindness is powerful, especially in a family setting. Her letter continued, “I am even trying to be kinder now because we are working on a temple sealing this year!”
Six years later she wrote me another letter: “My husband was [just] called and set apart as the bishop [of our ward].”2
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